Weekly Movie Round-up – December 14, 2006

by Andy Nordvall

THE HOLIDAY – Sure, honey, I’d love to see a movie with you.  Wait, you want to see what?

BLOOD DIAMOND – Ever feel guilty about enjoying mindless movie violence?  This film should stave off any feelings of liberal guilt, but with plenty of explosions.

THE QUEEN – I know I said I’d watch Helen Mirren in anything, but come on, people!

VOLVER – Joking aside, any film by Almodovar is a gift to the universe.  Having Penelope Cruz doesn’t hurt, either.

10 ITEMS OR LESS – Morgan Freeman mingles with us common folk.

THE HISTORY BOYS – An eccentric boarding school teacher opens boys’ minds while cupping their genitals.

UNACCOMPANIED MINORS – Given the lack of anything that would interest a viewer over the age of nine, the title should be an accurate description of this film’s audience.

FUR – Not so much a film as a bad reaction to mixing prescription medications with malt liquor.

DECK THE HALLS – Danny DeVito and Matthew Broderick fight over tacky Christmas decorations.  I think the winner gets the last Turbo Man doll.

APOCALYPTO – Aw heck, just insert your own anti-Semitic joke here.