Top Story! Weekly Report for the Week Ending December 23, 2012!

On Friday President Obama nominated Senator John Kerry as the next Secretary of State. Kerry accepted the job, then turned it down, and then accepted it again.

Cory Booker, the mayor of Newark, New Jersey, has decided not to run for governor against Chris Christie. Chris Christie has also decided not to run. Anywhere.

Toyota has been fined seventeen million dollars for delaying a recall. The recall was delayed because it was being driven in a Prius.
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TS!W’s Tommy Bechtold Explains How to Write the Perfect Letter to Santa!

TS!W 720: THE PERFECT LETTER TO SANTA by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Starring Tommy Bechtold (Tommy), and Phillip Wilburn (Phillip)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

“The Hobbit” Is Really, Really Boring!

“THE HOBBIT” IS REALLY, REALLY BORING by Eileen Mary O’Connell

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Jenna), Leo Margul (Chris), Sean Cowhig (Gandalf), Mitchel Baldwin (Bilbo Baggins) and Phillip Wilburn (Gollum)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Justice Antonin Scalia Works as a Mall Santa!

SCALIA CLAUSE by Ben Rosen

Starring Brent Pope (Justice Antonin Scalia), Tammie Smalls (Mall Worker), Mitchel Baldwin (Young Boy), Tommy Bechtold (Nerdy Boy) and Kipleigh Brown (Valley Girl)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Santa Makes the North Pole a Right-to-Work State!

SACKED BY SANTA by Mark Agee

Starring Tommy Bechtold (Santa), Kipleigh Brown (Jingle) and Brent Pope (Jangle)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Darwin the Ikea Monkey Just Can’t Get Any Respect!

MONKEA by Sean Tierney

Starring Phillip Wilburn (Darwin), Sean Cowhig (Customer), Leo Margul (Ikea Employee), Kipleigh Brown (Mother), Mitchel Baldwin (Son) and Tammie Smalls (Animal Control)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Susan Rice and John McCain Face Off…In Song!

NO DICE, RICE by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Rachel Maddow), Tammie Smalls (Susan Rice) and Phillip Wilburn (John McCain)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Stephen Baldwin’s Tax Problems Bring Together All the “Usual Baldwins” - His Brothers!

THE USUAL BALDWINS by Sean Tierney

Starring Sean Cowhig (IRS Employee #1), Tommy Bechtold (IRS Employee #2), Leo Margul (Stephen Baldwin), Phillip Wilburn (Alec Baldwin), Mitchel Baldwin (Billy Baldwin) and Brent Pope (Daniel Baldwin)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

Now That He’s On Twitter, the Pope Can’t Get Off The Internet!

TWITTER’S MOST BLESSED by Hank Layton

Starring Leo Margul (Pope Benedict XVI) and Tommy Bechtold (Cardinal)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

After the 2DayFM Hot 30 Australian DJ Scandal, a US Afternoon Drive Radio Show Has to Tone Down Its Prank Calls!

CRANK CALLED OFF by Toby Muresianu

Starring Sean Cowhig (Johnny), Brent Pope (The Bear), Leo Margul (Pizza Guy), Tammie Smalls (Producer) and Mitchel Baldwin (Saul Rosenstein)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt