The Top Story! Weekly Report for Sunday, July 27, 2014!

THE TOP STORY! WEEKLY REPORT FOR SUNDAY, JULY 27, 2014

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Anchor), Stacy Rumaker (Anchor), Eileen Mary O’Connell (Ellie Graber), Zach Zucker (Orphan), Matt Blitz (Batman) and Troy Holden (Peter’s Place Owner)

Directed by Sean Cowhig

The Top Story! Weekly Report for the Week Ending July 27, 2014!

In a new interview, Joe Biden says he told Vladimir Putin, “I don’t think you have a soul.” Putin denied the claim, pointing out that he has thousands of tortured souls trapped in the Kremlin basement.

Texas Governor Rick Perry plans to deploy 1,000 National Guard troops to the Mexico border to stop a surge of illegal immigrants. If that doesn’t work, Perry will go with his next plan to keep people wanting to enter the country: becoming president.

On Tuesday, a massive fruit recall was announced for fruit sold at Walmart. The recall has affected zero percent of Walmart customers.
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The Top Story! Weekly Report for Sunday, July 20, 2014!

THE TOP STORY! WEEKLY REPORT FOR SUNDAY, JULY 20, 2014

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Anchor), John Druska (Anchor), Mitchel Baldwin (Jimmy Fallon), Jimmy Guidish (Arnold Schwarzenegger), Leo Margul (Fred Savage), Michael Hughes (Daniel Stern Voiceover) and Zach Zucker (Orphan)

Directed by Kristina Adelmeyer

The Top Story! Weekly Report for the Week Ending July 20, 2014!

Russia’s foreign minister says that President Obama imposing economic sanctions in response to the Ukraine crisis is “bullying”. But shooting down a civilian airliner with hundreds of people inside is totally cool.

Microsoft is shutting down its Xbox Entertainment Studio. Then they plan to turn it back on again to see if that makes it run better.

Prison inmates in California are suing claiming that while governor Arnold Schwarzenegger was responsible for exposing them to a leprosy-like disease. Schwarzenegger replied that they should consider themselves lucky because. . . IT’S NOT A TUMOR!!
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The Top Story! Weekly Report for Sunday, July 13, 2014!

THE TOP STORY! WEEKLY REPORT FOR SUNDAY, JUNE 29, 2014

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Anchor), Matthew Harris (Anchor), Tillery Johnson (Matthew McConaughey), Eileen Mary O’Connell (Citizen Concerned About NSA Spying), Sean Cowhig (Mike Boyer), Jen Cain (Rock Bingo Hall Player) and Bennie Arthur (Disney World Visitor Who Lost Fingertips)

Directed by Michael Hughes

The Top Story! Weekly Report for The Week Ending July 13, 2014!

LeBron James announced Friday he is returning to play for the Cleveland Cavaliers. Cleveland residents weren’t sure how to respond to the news, since it’s been decades since they’ve experienced any joy.

A new report claims that the NSA is keeping track of our selfies posted online. Citizens are concerned that the NSA is looking at our photos, because they’re not even “liking” them.

A new Quinnipiac University poll named Barack Obama as the worst president since World War II. However, the poll has a margin of error of plus or minus everyone’s racist uncle.
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The Top Story! Weekly Report for Sunday, June 29, 2014!

THE TOP STORY! WEEKLY REPORT FOR SUNDAY, JUNE 29, 2014

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Anchor), Sean Cowhig (Anchor), Mitchel Baldwin (Shia LaBeouf), John Abbott (Arresting Officer), Tammie Smalls (KFC Spokesperson), Blake Walker (Dick Pic Bandit), Corey Podell (Girl You Talked to At the Bar), Adam Campbell-Schmitt (Male 1920’s Reporter) and Eileen Mary O’Connell (Female 1920’s Reporter)

Directed by Adam Campbell-Schmitt

The Top Story! Weekly Report for the Week Ending June 29, 2014!

John Boehner wants to file a lawsuit against President Obama, claiming abuse of power. Obama wielded his incredible power later that day, when he begged Congress for permission to go to the bathroom.

In Detroit, a 12-year-old boy who had been missing for a week, was discovered alive and well. And if you live in Detroit, that’s the worst possible outcome.

Kim Jung Un has called Seth Rogen and James Franco’s new movie “The Interview” an act of war. He was most upset about a scene that shows people in North Korea eating food.
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The Top Story! Weekly Report for Sunday, June 22, 2014!

THE TOP STORY! WEEKLY REPORT FOR SUNDAY, JUNE 22, 2014

Starring Kipleigh Brown (Anchor), Rebecca Stevens (Anchor), Mitchel Baldwin (Jimmy Fallon), Ashleigh Hairston (Florida Resident), Jimmy Guidish (Bill Clinton), Derek Reid (Star Wars Nerd), Evan Boelsen (Elton John) and John Abbott (Alabama Judge)

Directed by Sean Cowhig

The Top Story! Weekly Report for the Week Ending June 22, 2014!

The United States announced they’ve captured the mastermind of the 2012 attack in Benghazi. However, Fox News said the report is false, because they did not arrest Hillary Clinton.

Mitt Romney is being urged to run for President in 2016 by some Republicans. And he’s being urged even harder to run by lots and lots of Democrats.

Florida Governor Rick Scott signed a law allowing limited use of medical marijuana. Florida residents are very upset about the law, because they think that instead the state should have legalized medical crystal meth.
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